Thursday 9 June 2011

HOME SWEET HOME TURNED into ASHES

our Ancestral House before the fire
I was alone in my room reading my books at the same time listening to the radio when the voice of Barbara Streisand struck on my ear when she sang the song “Memory”.  The phrase that makes me smile and makes me cry is that when it says “Memory all alone in the moonlight I can smile with the old days I was beautiful then, I remember the time I knew what happiness was let the memory live again”. Mixed emotion is what I felt on that specific time and the only thing that makes me realized is that the tears run to my cheeks. I know its Gods plans even though mans fault. It’s nearly a year since that tragic and horrifying raging fire caught our lovely house into ashes in less than 20 minutes.

during the fire
It was Saturday, July 24, 2010 at 7:00 o’clock in the evening when I received a text message from a close friend of mine telling me that there is a big fire that occurred near our house. The fire was horrendous but she will give update from time to time. I was really upset at the same time praying that to keep away my family and our ancestral house from the tragedy. The next text message sent to me was “please calm yourself for I know it is difficult to accept it, the fire was next to your house”.  I was working at that time doing my late shift, fortunate enough that I’ve finished giving medication to my patient. I run away crying get my mobile and started dialing my mother, father and sister-in-law's number to no avail. My hands were shaking because I do not know whom I am going to call. I keep dialing their numbers then lucky enough that after ten minutes of waiting at somebody to answer my call my father was on the other line in a calm tone but I know deep inside he was crying in pain and agony. I could not breathe and I cried and cried and I asked what happened. My father told me that the raging fire started at the back house due to a query faulty wiring. My father evens told me that there is nothing we can do, control yourself, and do not spare your tears with the things that have gone away for there is nothing we could do. He seems so calm but deep inside his heart is bleeding profusely but if he will  not be strong what will happened then, damage was already been done.

another scenery
At that time of the accident my mother was ready for bed for it is Sunday the following day so she went to sleep early to be ready on the following day. God is still with us since she turned off the air conditioned in the room which enables her to hear the noise outside when people was shouting for fire. My father was downstairs reading whiles my nieces and nephews were watching television in the dining area. They were six in the house when the worst tragedy in our life happened.

According to the people who keep me posted of the accident, my mother is really in shock just embracing the image of the Virgin Mary on her hand and keeps shouting and tends to run to our house. Our neighbors grab my mother preventing her not to go inside our burning house. She was only left with her night clothes and underwear. All the important documents and some jewelry were burned. My nephews collected couple of their clothes. My father was having what he was wearing on that day including the mobile on his pocket. Our good neighbors able to remove the multicab and the motorcycle as well as collect our sofa set, television, dining table, some chairs and the big family canvas frame that only reminds us of what we have all through those years.

The tears that run through my cheeks denote pain.  Pain for the memories that we built and cherish on that once adorable house vanishes just like a wind.  Pain for the showed efforts, sweats, and sacrifices my parents undergo to have that house. The house where I originally born and whom we categorized as our ancestral house. The house that stood there for 37 lovely and a fruitful year that was not been touch with any calamities but good for shelter. The house wherein family reunions were held and we called a home.

hours after the fire
It is very painful to think that very sad day in our life wherein everything that we have was being taken away. I do not know why it happened like that but the only thing that makes me sure is that God is still with us for no life was been wasted on that night. I have been asked on hundreds of times in my life why God allows tragedy and suffering. I have to confess that I really do not know the answer totally, even to my own satisfaction.

Some comforting and encouraging messages from my friends enable me to accept slowly the reality:
•Just hold on and pray, God will not give you trial which you cannot make it.
•This is God’s plan…sometimes we have to undergo all these to have what we desire. Be Strong and have the faith. Talk to God and ask for his guidance to lead you to the right thing that you have to do.
•Let it all out and try to express your emotions, sometimes we just need to set back and let it go…
•God has its plan for all us, you’re not alone, I am sure millions of others even myself had endured what you are going through. Tomorrow will be a better day for you. Take care and God Bless.
•Each one of us has its own CROSS to carry…have FAITH, be STRONG and DO THE RIGHT THING. In doing so, just remember you CAN’T PLEASE EVERYONE…you will be hurt…just be READY and most of all you have to KNOW YOURSELF WELL, because NO MATTER what they say it WON’T MOVE YOU and INCH… I miss you!!!
•I am so sorry to hear this. Our hearts and prayer go out to you and your family and those who were victims of such horrendous devastation. I know that there're no amount of words can comfort you, nor them but I believe God can and His loving and compassionate hand to touch each of you…I want you to know that you are very much thought of…God Bless…(tight hug!!)…
•I was so desperately sorry to hear about and see the photos of your family home.  I hope everyone is doing ok and rebuilding their lives the best they can. My thoughts are with your entire family
•Heavenly Father, look upon our loved ones, affected with this conflagration in our home place, in this time of need, and have mercy on them. Help them to rebuild their lives. Protect them, and help them to live for You. Father, we ask this blessing through Christ our Lord. Amen. Our Lady of Consolacion, console and pray for us…
•Everything is over it's a new start and more challenge to come...let His shine through...the happiest people in the world is not those who have problems but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect...God Bless Your Heart…
•That is what matters, loved ones are all safe...
•So sorry to hear about what happened…thank God everyone in your family is safe and that is what matters most…I’ll be praying for you and your family…just hang in there, hope for the best and pray for guidance and strength…GOD BLESS…
•Hope all is well. Glad your family is safe. God Bless!
•That is what I’ve told you, it made us sad but just think that it's only material thing ok? ‘What matters most is that they are all safe...I know He will provide everything and he will never leave us empty...Lets continue praying...cheer up!!
•I am sorry to hear about it. I know it’s difficult to start all over again. But try to think the positive side, that the rest of your family members are safe.
•Life must go on...continue praying!
•Sorry to hear about it. And thank God so much that they are ok. Continue praying and keep the faith burning. A tragedy happened but you can see how good God is that none of your family members got hurts... Godspeed!
•Continue praying: I know it’s not easy for you to move on but you have too...God Bless your heart.
•Lord hear us our prayer....We are praying that your family is always safe whatever trials may come.
•Just take it easy, will just need to pray always for more guidance and strength for us and to our family...
•I am sorry to hear about what happened. The good news is all of them are safe and sound.
•You and your family is in our prayers... there is always sunshine after the rain...hold on to HIS promise...
•Time heals all wounds, they say...just HOLD ON and never let go...cast all your burdens to HIM...you’re not alone, there are people out there whose problems were worse than your problem...God gives us trials not because he wants us to stumble but He gave us these trials because He knows we can handle it if we just have the FAITH... the important is, no lives been spared...and there is always HOPE...
•Never give up!! Trust in the Lord! I lighted candles for you to make you stronger and for your family back home. God bless,
•Sorry to hear that, well pray for you and your family for strength ... Well get n touch, you take care while am very sure our LORD has been protecting them, too
•Consider the blessing that they are safe... Though I know it will be bit hard especially when you're in shock... keep praying that is the best weapon we can have in a battle likes this
•I hope you and your family is ok now. I had like to think that whatever that was been build up with your parents, it was not been wasted cause they have a loving daughter like you. I am sure it will be recovered slowly. Allow God to do His great plans. Take care.
•Sorry to hear this devastating news...just put yourself together in hang in there! take care GOD bless!
•So sorry to hear about your family. Be strong for them. We will pray with you
•Sorry to hear about it...everything happens for a reason… just be thankful to Him everyone is safe...take it easy, keep praying...take care, miss you.
•Sorry to hear! My thought is with you! God bless you and your parents.
•So sorry to hear such unfortunate news...God is our ultimate comfort...keep the faith.
the day after the fire "another life"
•Sorry to hear that, I know it’s hard but just hang in there, be strong...Everything will fall into place...

So many lessons I’ve learned with what happened to us. I know things happen for a reason. I have to accept, by faith, that God is sovereign, and He is a God of love and mercy and compassion in the midst of suffering. And God will not left us empty handed, if He takes away something from us He will give us something in return in another form and another way and it’s up to us to acknowledge and understand what it is. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to proper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you." Jeremiah 29:11-12.

Now, I find joy in every simple thing and see beauty in every situation. I know that the secret of contentment knows how to enjoy what we have, and to be able to lose all desire for things beyond our reach. And when times are difficult, I always remember that no pain comes without a purpose.

Wednesday 1 June 2011

SOMETIMES


Sometimes stars fall from the sky
Sometimes darkness overcome the light
Sometimes the sun eclipsed the moon
Sometimes you say in love there are no rules
Sometimes I disappeared in you
Sometimes you disappeared from me
And sometimes ambition bites the nail of success
And every artist is a cannibal
That every poet is a thief
And sometimes a lover is liar
That kills you on my inspiration and sing about the grief.


FOR MY PAPA

No words can ever describe you
For me all the good adjective fitted you
Nothing compares you
How lucky am I to have you.

Papa, no matter what they said
Your love shows the way I was molded
Being a person with respect and values
Makes possible to achieve my dreams.

I could remember when they narrated to me
You look after me when I was three months old
To stand as a father and mother to me
That makes me proud.

If I would be given a chance to choose my father
No seconds thoughts it would be you, Papa.
For me you are likes leaves that will not wither
Your love for me is eternity, Papa.
I am the luckiest daughter in the whole world
For I can’t be bought with the material things
But to live with the good traits that you showed
And have the courage to stand for my rights.

For giving me all the supports that I fully needed
For making me what I am now
For nurturing and looking after my children while I’m away
For all those things, I love you so much Papa.